I resorted to prostitution/escorting to stay afloat. I regret lying about what my job was to my newest potential lover. I want out so so badly but it all seems so far away. No one will ever know what I have had to do. It is something that will have to stay with me for life. I know the shame will fade with time but I will alway be in fear of my partners and family finding out.
I regret going out last night…. I got myself way too drunk to the point where I cannot remember most of the night. I regret getting in that car with you because now I feel violated but I feel like it’s my fault… you were sober, I was not but I must have consented. Even though I don’t remember much I know we slept together at your friends house. I don’t remember having sex but I know it happened. I regret being me at the moment. I know I’m using alcohol as a way to escape reality. I feel trapped in my own head but now I feel dirty.
My biggest regret is not being strong enough. I’ve let my friends, co-workers and family walk over me,use me and expect me to handle and hide everything. From drinking to drugs to unfairness to being the lucky winner who gets all the shit, I’ve had to deal and keep it all to myself. I never stood up for myself…
Giving so much of my love and time to someone who truly didn’t deserve it. The fact that I have found someone else and am completely happy but still have those moments where I remember you blaming me for everything thing that went wrong, from your kids to your own lies and terrible decisions. I regret that I didn’t find my inner strength sooner than I did.
My regret is my existence. My life plays out as a cycle of mistake after mistake. I can look back and see them so clearly now but not the reason why. Did I know they were mistakes at the time? Some of them, yeah I did. Others, I don’t know, I really don’t know. Will this stop me making more mistakes? No. Everybody makes mistakes, we’re human after all. Mine are more than that, I can’t use that as an excuse anymore. It’s so clear. My regrets and my misery are self inflicted. They overshadow the good things in my life. The things I don’t deserve. Eventually they will overtake them. They will spread like a poison inflicting misery on the people around me. My regret is that I exist, it’s that I can’t go back to right my wrongs, its that I know I will continue to make more for as long as I am alive. I am my own worst enemy and eventually I will become that of the people I love. My regret is that I’m am not strong enough to free them of me.
My biggest regret is not learning how to say no to people. I have always been someone who wants to please everyone around them. I have put myself in an unhealthy state both physically and mentally to help and please others.
Not taking my life nearly twenty years ago. Had I gone through with it, I would have saved myself nearly 20 years of a rollercoaster of misery, PTSD, divorce and being cheated on, and never finding my place where I belong. I belong in a grave. I wish I could time travel back and say “you’re making the right choice. Please do it”
I regret thinking that being sexually assaulted was my fault. I was out with my friends and I had too much to drink. After house parties and multiple bar hops – I was blacked out. My acquaintance took me to his place, I remember he offered me a glass of water but after I don’t remember really anything . I woke up in his bed and I was fully naked. I was scared and didn’t know what to do. I didn’t have my phone, lost my wallet and my clothes were flung all over the room. He was passed out . I tried to get dressed without him waking up but he did and took me back to my dorm room. He was my friend and he was always nice to me. I felt alone and I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. I would still see him out at the bars and he would try to get me to come back with him – the stupid thing is, I did. I felt like a need to make this obviously broken relationship work and somehow it would make me feel better. It didn’t and I was really down about for a long time . But once I realized it was NOT my fault, I blocked him out of my life and never looked back. It was just hard for me to believe that my friend (or so I thought) would do something like that to me. You never think it’s going to happen to you and it’s life alterning when it does. I still find myself not being able to trust people especially guys who start talking to me.
Life has passed me by or I feel that it has. I’m in my mid 50’s and I’ve never married or had children. Sometimes I’ve had regrets about this and other times I don’t. It depends on how I feel. When I hear about something terrible that has happened to someone who is married (domestic violence, child abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse), then I’m glad that I never married or had children. When I hear about someone who is happy with their family or a happy family, then I have regrets. Sadly it seems like more people are unhappy than happy.