I regret my own inability to stop caring so much about other people and their daily struggles. I empathize with the world around me to the point of exhaustion. I’ve always been able to truly put myself in a stranger’s shoes, to understand them and help guide them. When I worked as an EMT, it helped me so much to treat my patients, to connect with them, and positively impact their lives. As a medical student now, Im not sure if it’s the stress I’m under or the horrible things that are happening all over the world right now, but I feel so overwhelmed. I’ve seen people die before, I’ve even been there to hold their hand in their final moments or frantically attempted to bring them back to life with everything I had. I remember every single patient, I mourned every single one. But I was able to move forward to the next patient and be okay. Lately, I’m so overwhelmed with the daily images I’m seeing of people dying. Patients with terminal illnesses, people without proper access to medical care that would have saved their lives had they had it in time. People being abused, murdered and raped. All these horrible stories that seem to constantly tell us all that humanity is gone. Images of children washing up on European shores. I feel every single loss as if it were my own family. I can barely sleep thinking about all of these people, how much I wish I could help them but have no power to do it. I need to distance myself like I’m taught by my teachers, but I can’t seem to shake this giant sense of loss and guilt every time I see another tragedy.


3 thoughts on “SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: March 29, 2017

  1. Focus on all the good that you do and look at your successes. Just know in medicine, there are two rules. Rule 1, people die. Rule 2, you can’t change rule number 1.
    I know, your efforts, talent and skills are appreciated…regardless of the outcome.
    To have that compassion, tells me you are in the right place.
    Continue to do good things.


  2. You are most probably super-sensitive and you most probably have super memory ability. Follow John’s advice, and spend some time each day reminding yourself that you do so much good and that you are in the right field for your skills and talents. The world is a better place for having you in the medical field. Also be kind to yourself by taking a walk on a beach or in a park to enjoy the fresh air and see nature. It is very calming.


  3. I can completely agree with John. People do die and that can’t be changed. you should be proud and celebrate what good things you do.


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