SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: November 16, 2015

I regret that every year I  put a little number in the corner of my calendar to mark how many years we would have been together. I regret that I still miss you (or at least who you used to be). I regret that because of this, I cant seem to trust anyone else enough to let them in. I regret that I allowed all of this to make me incapable of allowing myself to really fall in love again. I regret not spending one more week with you to see if you would have said “I love you” to me.

2 thoughts on “SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: November 16, 2015

  1. Its difficult to say whether or not u made the right choice to leave or.not without knowing the whole story. But i do know what its like to be dwelling on the questions in ur mind had u hung in there that much longer. Its something i do frequently myself over someone I waited patiently over 3 yrs to be allowed the opportunity to simply have enough of his time on a personal level to purhaps enjoy a normal conversation like two caring human beings…instead of it always having to stem around remaining in such a distant professional surrounding and demeaner. Even with a special personal invite to an intimate celebration of success against his past battle with a serious illness, I seemed to fail…for even so much as a tip of a glass or tiny smile over my son throwing a bowling ball down the lane. I have never in my life been rejected and left to stand feeling so dumb founded and confused in all my life. I had to stop being so blind and patient… For me it obviously ment I didnt eggist…his time was too precious to share any further than necessary within his job with the likes of me. I have yet.to figure out what I did to him that warrented such a cold respnce with my every foolish attempt. They say things happen for a reason… Ive yet to understand with my situation but in urs it could be that they were so self involved and selfish that they just expected you to always b offering ur heart and time. Sometimes we don’t always want to see the selfishness that consumes a persons heart and mind until much toll has taken over ours. I think you made the right choice letting them know that as much as you were there for them…without the same in return from them…it wouldn’t work. Eventually it would have ended with even more hurt and wonder…believe me on that. I married 25 yrs ago to a very selfish minded person. There came a time where I questioned if he even had a conscience at all. Thats still under investigation actually. Believe in ur desision to be whats right..otherwise u are just.hurting urself over someone who could only b wondering why it is you arent still willing to wipe their butt for them

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